Today he would have been 34

Six months had gone by since the great day when they exchanged their vows, til death do us part. He was 32 and she was 19. At the time the numbers did not make a difference. Love was grand and life looked promising.

The first six months felt like a long honeymoon. Life was going smoothly right up until the day she had skipped a period. Deep down in her heart she knew that finally her greatest dream would come true in eight months; she would become a mother. She couldn´t wait for the love of her life to come home and share her hunch.

After a love - filled candle lit dinner, she sprang the news on him. He did not have the reaction that she had been hoping for. “But are you sure?” , he asked. To be honest she had not done any tests to really find out, but since she had skipped a period, she could not think of another reason for that, every month her friend would come and go when expected. “I am not sure I can love you if you gain any weight” he added. Her heart skipped a beat. What was he saying? Did she really hear those words? Was she in a dream and soon the alarm clock would go off? No, it was real.

As she was fighting with her thoughts and feeling, she had not noticed that he had gone to the living room to make a call. “My sister is taking you to her gynecologist this week to check.” She took a deep breath and told him that that would be fine although she had already scheduled an appointment with her own. “No, my sister´s is better and she will be able to accompany you.”

A few days went by and her sister-in-law came by on the day of the appointment. Few words were pronounced and by the look on the sister-in-law´s face, she knew something wasn´t right. The office was tiny and cramped. There were two rooms and a bathroom. It just felt so dark and dirty. There were no other patients waiting, which she found strange. Her doctor´s office waiting room was always so packed with patients. How come this office was empty? There wasn´t a nurse and the door locked.

“Come with me, please.”, the doctor called. He asked her to go to the bathroom and change into the hospital gown he had handed over to her. “Please, lie down and try to relax. It´ll be quick. You might feel some discomfort. But in no time, you´ll be up and able to go. “As she heard these words float in the air, she couldn´t make heads or tails of what he was saying. “Excuse me, but I think I am pregnant, should I have a blood test or urine test first.” “Nonsense”, he blurted out and continue to do what he was doing. She felt a lot of pain and he just told her to relax that he was almost done.

Getting up she felt a bit dizzy; she was escorted into the office while her sister-in-law paid him with a blank check that her husband had signed the night before. The sister-in-law let out a tear, but the young girl could not realize why she was sad. Having a baby was supposed to be a joyful event. Why was everyone so miserable? “You should have this sonogram done. In a few days you will release a blood clot and there will be no need to worry.”

During the sonogram, her husband accompanied her. The technician had mentioned that there was a mass in her uterus which might be a baby. Her heart was thrilled, however, the expression on her husband´s face was of terror. She could not make out what was going on. Perhaps of her lack of experience in life, she was only 19.

Towards the end of that week, a huge blood clot came out but she had very painful cramps. She decided to call her mother who took her to her own gynecologist. This gynecologist was the doctor who had assisted her mom´s labor when she was born.

After he had examined her, he told her that she had had a miscarriage. Yes, she was expecting. When she had told him what she had been through, sadly he told her that she should report that other doctor. He had made a huge mistake.

Horrified, she decided to keep all of this to herself. That butcher had not made a mistake. He just did what he had been paid to do.  

Today, he would have been 34.

 

Written: August 2, 2020

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